Nightlife is filled with freaks and over-the-top “personalities.” They come out at night under the cover of darkness and strobe lights; but when you have night vision like yours truly, they’re easy to spot. This blog is all about scoping out those exceptional impresarios as I make my way through the underbelly of clubland.
Recently, I flew into New York to do some comedy at Gotham and hit the clubs. I’ve been dropping in on New York on a regular basis since college, but I always stay in The City, where I got fam, and rarely venture out to the surrounding boroughs. But with the Jersey Shore phenomena having grown on me, and with my close friend, Brooklyn-based artist Jonathan Riesco imploring for years, I journeyed off the uptight confines of Manhattan and into the thick fog of Long Island for a taste of authentic New York sociology. I decided to go cross the bridge the wrong way and hit a hotspot where the hair is on fire, the collars pop, and the Guido juice goes down like a Jägerbomb… Glo.
I’m from Miami, live in LA, and spend part of the year chronicling the nightlife industry in Vegas. I’m no stranger to enhanced boobs, but this place was ridiculous. I hadn’t made it to the bar before I passed about half a million dollars worth of silicon implants. Now, I noticed that unlike the skinny girls with the subtle, natural tans in those other places I cavort through, or the anorexic yuppie/hipster types you find in Williamsburg and the City, some of these LI ladies had six-packs, biceps, and brown-to-orange-hue tans. No wonder this is called Strong Island. All the guys around here are meatheads by necessity, because you need a cycle of Winstrol just to keep one of these Guidettes from kicking your ass after you check out her short friend with the crack-ass showing out her jeans.
In between slipping and sliding through a dancefloor packed with people, all of whom had very moisturized skin (I don’t mean sweat, I mean like lotion), I found the man I had come here to see- the over-the-top broskie behind the YouTube sensation, “Vinny the Chin Live (Strong Island Remix),” Vincenzo Michael Ferraro, better known as “Vinny the Chin.” In the age of people becoming famous on the heels of nothing but personality and party habits, and with stereotypical New York characters very much in fashion, Vinny the Chin just might be the new face of the Tri-State area club scene.
After I interrupted him as he was pumping his fist and flexing his bare pecks through his open shirt to the beat of the house music, pulling him away from two fake blonde bombshells, and then convincing him I wasn’t an undercover cop but the blogger who had emailed him about meeting, I had the following interview with Vinny the Chin. A quick disclaimer to anyone sensitive to admitted drug and steroid use, fighting, and the objectification of women: this guy has no censor. If you do have a sense of humor, meet the guy who makes everyone who hated Jersey Shore for glorifying Guido culture pull their hair out. Brace yourself.
Are you motivated to show the world a different side of New York party culture than what we saw branded on Jersey Shore?
Being the best ever motivates me, like challenging myself to get some girl’s number. Seeing if I can hook up, having the sharpest clothes, best muscles, best car, being the best looking guy here in a crowd. Just being the Alpha male wherever I go.
How'd you get the name “Vinny the Chin?”
I have had my share of fights. It has a double untondra [sic] meaning. I had a short temper as a younger guy, so my friends and neighborhood people would say that my chin had an addiction to fists. Then after a few years, they noticed that when I got socked, I didn't go down. I’ve never been knocked down. These days though I am calmer. The ecstasy helps.
How does Vinny get ready for a night out?
Tan in the afternoon, listen to house music, sometimes buy a new outfit or belt, shave my body, shower, do the hair, de-odorant, cologne, bronzer, pre-game with Red Bull vodka, meet up with my boys, stop at 7-11 for gum. I used to do coke too before hitting the club, but I am trying to stay sober now. I got like a schedule to keep.
Where's Vinny hanging?
All the hottest clubs in Long Island. Right now Glo, Venue, in the summertime it’s Neptunes, Allan acres, and in the city Pacha. Mainly everywhere there is good house music. A lot of places I use to love are not around no more – Zachery’s and Origen. I hang out with a lot of people, but right now I'll give a shout out to my main wing man Vinny da Beak and first childhood friend ever Joey Heads (the large guys standing behind him).
Why does Vinny always have his boys behind him?
In case shit gets crazy at the club and a knucklehead runs his mouth too much. Also as wing men for the girl I am trying to fuck’s friend. Hewas [sic] usually travel in packs, so you have to travel in packs. It’s the law of relativity. If one hewa is left behind or out of the equation, it can ruin your whole chance. So you have to match up perfectly, or hook up in the parking lot and get it over with, which is preferred, so she doesn’t have to make the awkward Saw movie decision of ‘do I leave this bitch here alone and fuck this stranger, or do I stay with her.’ That is why you should shoot for the parking lot…
What's Vinny's work out plan?
It is only warm in NY during the summer, so that is beach weather. That is when I really get in shape. I do steroids, cause how you expect me to stay in shape? I go out bigger and buffer than anyone else. I’m not just some fucking Jabroni. If I’m sitting next to some chick and she sees a guy with bigger muscles than me, how am I gonna compete with that? People who say steroids are no good are right, but they are also probably virgins.
What's the craziest thing Vinny's ever done?
Some shit I can't remember. But this isn't really the craziest, but it's a good story. There was this one girl at Oneonta when I visited, and she had no arms, like two stubs. She was really nice, but drank a lot. My boy Meatball would call her Flipper behind her back. Long story short, it was a dare to see who would hook up with her. I did her.
So are you finding a way to make a living as a party personality?
Yeah. YouTube “celebrity party person.” I get hired, paid to show up places and shit. It's because I AM the party. I bring that New York Long Island energy that no one else in the country really has.”
I noticed you have a lot of female fans?
I'm the total package. I'm honest most the times too. I tell them if their hair sucks. I grow on them like a fuckin’ fungus. I engulf them like a mold and fungus.
What's this I hear about you being the face of a college website?
Yeah. The rumors are true. This big, huge college website called OnCampusDrama has signed me to be the face of it. It's crazy. They are doing a nationwide tour on a big bus to every college starting September, throwing a big party to every campus they pull up to. They want me to join them to bring the energy.
When Vinny comes face to face with a “real” celebrity, what does he do?
A real celebrity? What’s that supposed to mean? I don’t think they are better than me, so I don’t give a shit. If it is a girl celebrity, then maybe try and hook up to have a story for my friends and add her to the casualty list, body count. Oh, let me make a shout out to a very special celebrity woman. Can I do another shout out? (Mind you, he’s talking to my tape recorder… I answer “yes”). This is to Lil Kim. I love you. Let me take you on a date. Hit me up! I usually don't date black girls, but I'm in love with you. You think she will see this?
Some of this interview had to be followed up with a phone interview, due to the fact I couldn’t hear half of it on my recorder, and thanks to Vinny’s insisting on talking to me right next to a speaker so the music could help him “think straight.” I also got cut off by his boys Joey Heads and Vinny the Beak every few minutes because they wanted to ask Vinny again and again if he knew who I was. Check out Vinny the Chin’s Twitter and YouTube pages for where you can spot him next, to see why many believe he’s the next big marketing vehicle for Guidoness. Look for an upcoming documentary on his wild antics out next year.
You can contact Vinny the Chin for interviews or appearances on Twitter or via e-mail.
I can see you…but not like, in a stalker way or anything like that.