They say you can't judge a man by his shoes, but it's kinda hard not to if he's sporting glittery Ed Hardy kicks with gold dragon laces. No joke, it’s hard to compete with all the diehard sneakerheads out there, but here are some guidelines to keep you reputation as a sneaker aficionado intact.
Don’t: Nike Dunks
Dunks are done. If you have a pair of Nike Dunks (or four), please donate them to a third world charity. I would be doing a disservice by not starting off this article with that tidbit. The dunks served their purpose in the sneaker world. They hit at the same time that sneaker culture really got big. But they became so prevalent that your aunt Edna may be rocking a pair of limited edition Voltron dunks, without even knowing it. Dunks have become the sneakers for people that don’t know about sneakers.
Do: Nike Vandals
If dunks were your “starter sneaker,” and you find it hard to say goodbye, let me wean you off of your dunk addiction with some Nike Vandals. They are reminiscent of your dunks, but the durable canvas body and the strap give it a nice edge. They are also available in high tops.
Don’t: All-White Sneakers
Paging Nurse Robinson, Nurse Robinson… yeah, let’s discuss all-white sneakers. Unless you are a nurse, there is no need for you to be rocking these. A little color never hurt anyone, and this goes for all-black sneakers as well. Try these Reebok Caliroots Pack. They are white, but have subtle yellow accents. Even the shiny leather fronts are tasteful.
Don’t: Sneaker-Shoes
And just because you have dual personalities doesn’t mean your footwear has to. Skechers popularized the fugly-as-hell sneaker/shoe hybrid. Please, make up your mind. If you want to wear shoes, go ahead. If you feel like sneakers, do your thing. Just pick one or the other because these sneaker/shoe mutations are never pretty.
Do: Shoes with Sneaker Technology
Instead of these 
overly stitched monstrosities, try something in the Cole Haan line. The high-end shoemaker was acquired by Nike a while back and now a lot of their styles have Nike Air technology, like these Air Marley Venetians. They even make women’s shoes with the same principles.
Don’t: Glittery Rainbow Messes
Sneakers have expiration dates
. Remember the more outlandish and “couture” the design, the faster it will be on the bargain bin at Marshall’s (expect all those reflective gold and silver high tops at the bin soon). I have seen kicks emblazoned with skulls, crossbones, and glitter, looking as though an evil clown threw up all over them. The Ed Hardy/Christian Audigier look is thankfully on its way out, so think twice about getting the sneakers with the bedazzled skull and crossbones.
Don’t: Broken Sneakers
And if your shoes are talking (the sole is coming off and flapping), it’s time to silence them once and for all.
Do: Clean Your Sneakers
And do I really need to tell anyone to keep their shoes clean? Out of all the Dos, this might be the biggest one. Repeat after me: dirty Converse All Stars are not a fashion statement. You do not look cute/alternative with dusty, cruddy kicks. If the homeless guy on the street is looking at your feet and saying, “Dayum,” take your ass to the store and get some fresh, new $30 All Stars.